HOW DO WE MAKE THE GIFT OF YOM KIPPUR AND THE SIMCHA OF SUKKOS A PART OF US THROUGHOUT THE YEAR?

What is the Opportunity for Lasting Change?
With the goal of helping us realize our greatness and role as a nation, twice a month a new Lasting Change Lesson will be posted on www.forgiveit.org. We are now on a spiritual high from Yom Kippur and heading into the delight of Succos. How incredible would it be to bring the gifts of this season into our year and transform our inner-world?

Extend the value of Yom Kippur throughout the year
The season that bundles Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkas and Simchas Torah infuses us with our most potent opportunity for solidifying our spiritual growth for the coming year. On Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur we lay the foundation of our own holiness while Sukkos and Simchas Torah binds the holiness we’ve acquired to our innate goodness and Hashem’s willingness to be our Father and King.

Do you sometimes find that when Yom Kippur is over it feels like you’re right back to where you started from?
We make commitments to change. We ask Hashem to forgive us. Yet, we may find it difficult to take advantage of the foundation for lasting change that we’ve created on Yom Kippur. The key to making changes last is the belief that we can build a dwelling place for Hashem in our hearts on a foundation that will endure throughout the year.

I’m not really sure where to start
Making improvements to our character requires commitment, discipline and consistency. The objective of the Opportunity for Lasting Change is learning how to accomplish this. Completing each of the 24 lessons is the key to building our own personal house for Hashem, brick by spiritual brick.

Now that Yom Kippur is over, what are the main take-aways?
Remember the commitments you made to yourself on Yom Kippur. Hold the image of the person you felt you had become in your mind. Now that you know being this improved version of yourself is acheivable, continually remind yourself that this is the ‘True You’ which can last forever.

What is the message of Ashamnu (we have been guilty) meant to accomplish?
Yes, we are guilty of sinning. However, as a result of this, which Midah do I commit to working harder on this year? I am setting the goal of elevating my spirituality to support the belief that I am seen by Hashem, I matter to Hashem and that I am deserving of all the good He is giving me. When I support myself, nurture myself, approve of myself and love myself, it is much easier to commit to working harder to fulfill the Mitzvos that G-d has commanded.

What is one concrete step that you can take towards this goal?
As Jews, we have been designated to attain the status of Mamleches Kohanim v’Goy Kadosh. A holy nation is a kingdom of regality. Let’s stop resisting our magnificence. Hashem has designated us as Malchus and is inviting us to express this royalty in the refinement of our speech, our dress and our actions. We were created to be Kings and Queens and ambassadors for Hashem. Pick one concrete Midah you commit to improving that will elevate your spiritutality. Write it down. Share it if you’re comfortable doing so. Visualize yourself embodiying that Midah as your true self several times a day.

What is a way to know that improvement is within your reach?
There is a great pleasure in acting as royalty. Kings and Queens are always giving and bestowing goodness to their subjects. Because it’s not easy to do, apologizing to those we’ve harmed, with sincerity and dignity, is to give like a generous king or queen. To treat everyone with Kavod is Godly. Though it takes effort, this is what we’re capable of. The most certain way to improve is increasing humility by being willing to say, ”I made a mistake. I was wrong.”

What’s the best way to stay committed to self-improvement?
When we are faced with opportunities to lash out, to hold resentment, we can tap into this truth and experience our elevated selves. This will bring us tremendous closeness with Hashem and will guide us towards His will.

This is the antidote to Ashamnu is serving Hashem b’Simcha
If we have spoken or acted wrongly we can own that we’ve stepped away from our own Malchus. We can step back into it by apologizing, making amends and asking for Mechila. By doing so, we restore our dignity and the dignity of our fellow man or woman. This is true Kiddush Hashem. The Kedushas Levi writes that Sukkos is also a time of Teshuva but, not out of Yirah (awe) but rather Me’ahavah (out of love). Combining this type of Teshuva with serving Hashem B’Simcha is the most certain way to know that we’re continuously growing.

How can we be more sensitive to our fellow man?
As Bnei and Bnos Milachim we are meant to be gracious and kind – to have a good eye. It is so important to not ridicule anyone; Jew or non-Jew, similar to you or different. It is beneath us.

How can we regain our status as sensitive people?
If you see someone who is rejected by society or less accepted in your community or Shul, perhaps because they appear to be a little bit different, please don’t act as if they don’t exist. Please go out of your way to get to know them. Invite them for a meal. Strike up a casual conversation, just so they don’t have to feel like an outcast. Share a smile and welcoming glance.

How can we soften the hard edges in our psyche that have formed throughout our Exile?
Know that there are hungry hearts longing for your encouraging words and your acknowledgment. You don’t have to be a community leader or a Rabbi to make the statement, “I’m there for you.” Your innate Malchus means that what you do matters and almost always, you intuit what’s right. We need to know of our magnificence so we don’t abdicate the role of giving to others.

Will I commit to acknowledging the hungry hearts around me?
Due to our great mission, if we ignore the suffering of others in our midst, we make space for suffering to flourish in the world. Our every action has universal implications. When we extend ourselves to others in our private lives we create a massive powerful impact towards the Geula. When we don’t, we may perhaps be prolonging the Exile.

In conclusion
Let’s make a year-long commitment to work on the Midah we have chosen to improve. Journal your successes and describe your challenges in detail. By acting more like the royalty we are, we can make improvement a solid part of who we are. Since we never know when Hashem will reveal Moshiach, don’t we want to greet him as the best version of ourselves possible?

May the words of our lips, and the yearnings of our hearts find favor before You Hashem; and may we merit to see the Bais Hamikdash in its glory, so on that day, Hashem will be King over all the world and that He will be One, and His name One.

Have a Gmar Tov and a Good G’bentched Year!